R&R for Superwoman
by heartstrings
Summary: Set immediately post-RR S4 finale . Lorelai worries about Rory and talks to Luke. Java Junkie one-shot.


I own nothing. I'm simply a huge java junkie.

Lorelai sat on the front steps of her new inn, a tear making its way down her cheek. Her friends and neighbors were asleep in there rooms, oblivious. That was how she wanted it; nobody could know why she was crying, so it was better that they just didn't know she was at all. Besides, Lorelai never needed anybody's help. She would handle this all on her own. She was, after all, superwoman.

It would be nice to have a shoulder to lean on, though, thought Lorelai as she slumped in place, holding herself up with her elbows. She kept thinking about her daughter, about… her daughter's mistake. That was all it could be called. A big fat mistake. How could Rory have slept with a married man? She was always the rational one, making the sensible decisions while Lorelai went off and made the mistakes. Yet here she was, sleeping with Dean and calling him hers and blaming Lindsay for making him cheat. With her. Rory had helped a man cheat on his wife.

"Why did they have to do that?" She spoke in a wavering voice to the empty front yard of the inn. A sob escaped along with the words and she hung her head, lifted her hands to her face and more tears began to fall. She had barely begun to allow herself her moment of grief when she heard a creaking sound behind her and jumped.

"Luke." She looked up at him as he made his way across the porch. He sat down next to her without saying a word. He looked concerned, but he also looked scared. Lorelai wondered why on earth he would be scared. Peering around, trying to avoid eye contact, Lorelai realized they were mere feet from where he had kissed her just a few hours ago. He had actually kissed her, she remembered in amazement. She could still feel her lips tingling and her heart melting like butter. That was one amazing kiss. She just wished it hadn't been immediately followed by devastating news.

"What's wrong?" Luke's voice brought her from her trance. She looked at him, tears filling her eyes, and knew she couldn't lie. But she couldn't betray her daughter's privacy, either. Before she could figure out what to say, he continued, his voice quiet and regretful. "Look, forget it ever happened. I don't want to upset you. Just forget it."

Lorelai's brain started sending out so many signals she couldn't them straight, but the basic gist of "correct him, you idiot" came through loud and clear. "No! I don't want to forget it ever happened! Luke, that kiss was… wow. Very wow. But I can't… I don't… I'm so sorry." She felt like the biggest jerk in the world. How could she say this so that he wouldn't hate her?

"We'll definitely talk about it. It's definitely… not something I want to forget about. But right now, just for tonight, can you be my friend? Can we put everything else on hold? I just… I really need a friend right now."

Luke looked relieved, which she was thankful for, but the increased concern on his face made her heart literally ache. She wanted so badly to not put him through this, after he had just given her quite possibly the best kiss of her life.

"I'm always your friend, Lorelai. No matter what happens, I'm always your friend." Lorelai smiled at him, wishing for him to not just be her friend right now. She wanted to kiss him again, and again, and again. But from the back of her mind came creeping up the reality of what her daughter was dealing with, what her daughter had done, and she knew that couldn't happen right now. Luke spoke again. "Do you want to tell me what's going on?" She felt the pull of her daughter's trust again, this time appearing as a weight inside her chest.

"I'm… I... Luke, I want to tell you. But it's not my secret to tell. I'm sorry. I just, can I…" Remembering her Meltdown-in-the-Park, and wanting that feeling of safety again, she lay her head on his shoulder. The feeling of him slipping his arm supportively around her back and placing his other hand in her hair couldn't have been more welcome if it was the elixir of life itself. She sighed, relieved to find she could still take comfort in something.

Lorelai never expected to feel such deep disappointment towards her daughter. Her pride and joy. Her everything. Then again, she never expected her daughter would do something like this. This must have been more or less how her own parents felt when she told them she was pregnant, she realized sadly.

It wasn't as if she loved Rory any less. Rory was still Rory, her amazing, strong, sweet, ridiculously smart, and incredibly beloved daughter. She just wasn't so innocent anymore. Lorelai found that the pain seemed to come from her disappointment with herself, that she hadn't been able to protect her daughter, to keep her from making mistakes like she did. Maybe not exactly like she did, but similar enough that she couldn't help but blame herself just a little bit.

"Where is Rory?" For a second Lorelai thought he knew. He asked about Rory with a knowing look in his eyes. But then she realized it must just be that he knows her so well. He knows she would only be this upset, on such a happy day for her, if it had to do with Rory.

"She's at home. I think she's sleeping on the couch. She didn't want to come back here, and she didn't want to-" Her voice broke and she took a deep breath. She was going to say 'be in her bed right now,' but she knew that would require an explanation. Besides, she wasn't sure she could vocalize the statement anyway. "She's just had a rough night."

Luke nodded, clearly aware that she was hiding something, but okay with that for now. He respected the bond between her and Rory enough not to insist on more information. Rory was obviously okay enough that Lorelai didn't need to be with her, and that was all Luke needed to know. So he simply held her a little tighter and let her breathe, and think, and relax into him.

After many minutes of comfortable silence, Lorelai lifted her head to look at him. She knew Rory would be okay, because, well, she was incredible and smart and capable. And she knew that she herself would be okay for two reasons. If she had raised Rory, she must be pretty capable herself. And, looking at the man whose arms still encircled her, she knew she wasn't alone. She had that shoulder to keep her from slumping down on the porch steps. And suddenly she didn't think that wanting her superman made her any less of a superwoman.

"Luke," she said finally, "kiss me".


End file.
